Football Sunday edition of No Child Left Behind


By borges, Section School House
Posted on Sun Nov 12, 2006 at 04:08:16 AM CST

[This in from Tom Wilson, but for a more considered view of the No Child Left Behind law see this link from the Hoover Institute that provides a handy chart of the 20 year history, 1981-2001.]

1. All teams must make the state playoffs and all MUST win the championship.  If a team does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held accountable.  If after two years they have not won the championship their footballs and equipment will be taken away UNTIL they do win the championship.

The rest below the fold...

2. All kids will be expected to have the same football skills at the same time even if they do not have the same conditions or opportunities to practice on their own. NO exceptions will be made for lack of interest in football, a desire to perform athletically, or genetic abilities or disabilities of themselves or their parents.

ALL KIDS WILL PLAY FOOTBALL AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL!

  1. Talented players will be asked to workout on their own, without instruction. This is because the coaches will be using all their instructional time with the athletes who aren't interested in football, have limited athletic ability or whose parents don't like football.

  2. Games will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in the 4th, 8th, and 11th game.(In WA, 3rd through 10th game) It will create a New Age of Sports where every school is expected to have the same level of talent, and all teams will meet the same minimal goals. If no child gets ahead, then no child gets left behind. If parents do not like this new law, they are encouraged to vote for vouchers and support private schools that can screen out the non-athletes and prevent their children from having to go to school with bad football players.

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